Am I a Grease Monkey You Decide?

                            Am I a grease monkey? You decide.

I’m sure that anyone who is reading this article and has a car has heard this term I will elaborate.  When you take your car to the garage for servicing or mechanical repair a Vehicle Technician or Motor Mechanic will work on your vehicle.  I’m also sure you would have caught a glimpse of the Technician who will work on your vehicle.  You may see him through a window, he will typically have his head under the bonnet of someone’s car.

The Technician will be wearing overalls, he will probably have oil or grease on his face and definitely on his hands and down his protective boiler suit.  This appearance has given rise to the descriptive term of Grease Monkey! It is a derogatory term which implies the Technician is not only dirty but has the intelligence of a monkey!

I wonder how many of you drivers have any idea of the training and knowledge required to be a Vehicle Technician or Motor Mechanic? I will describe my training as an example and this example may give you an insight into why the term Grease Monkey is so insulting to Vehicle Technicians.

At the age of 14 I chose to study the subject of Motor Vehicle Studies. MVS was a two year course at my secondary school (High school) in this MVS course we studied most aspects of a motor vehicle to a primary level of knowledge.  At the end of the two year course an “O” level equivalent qualification could be achieved. I studied hard on this course as motor vehicles were my passion even at 14 years old.

I passed the course with the second highest score ever in my school.  I left school at 16 and began trying to find a fully indentured apprenticeship in motor vehicles.  In 1981 fully indentured apprenticeships were dying out, I applied in writing to 61 separate garages! None of these garages were actively advertising for a mechanical apprentice.  Luckily my perseverance resulted in an apprenticeship with a Volvo main dealer in London.

My apprenticeship was to be between 4 and 5 years.  Within those 5 years I would be attending a technical college for one day a week and I had to give up one evening a week until 10.pm.  During this apprenticeship the wages are extremely poor. My first years wage was £32 per week equivalent of $60 a week.  On that wage I had to eat and travel to and from work and pay my parents house keeping.

In return for very poor wages and a 55 hour working week, I would receive a top class motor vehicle apprenticeship.  I was allocated to a qualified mechanic for on the job experience 5 and a half days a week.  I would use the mechanics tools and we worked together on every job he had.  A tutor from the City and Guilds of London would visit me once a month to check my level of competence was rising at the correct speed.

I had a paper log that I had to fill in detailing the different repairs I could carry out, my allocated mechanic would have to counter-sign my record of competence ensuring my tutors could accurately monitor my education.  At college we learned about motor vehicles in great detail from engines to gearboxes to electrics and electronics and final drive units. 

At the end of my year one apprenticeship I passed my year one exams with grades of excellent and above average achieved.  In year two of my apprenticeship my wages increased to £48 per week or $80.  I passed my driving test at 17 years old another prerequisite for my apprenticeship.  At college in day-release and evening classes we looked at fuel systems including Carburettors and fuel injection allied to Ignition systems. We were taught the workings and repair of automatic transmissions and anti-lock braking systems.

As part of my City and Guilds of London education we did an English exam in communication skills.  It is very important that a qualified Motor Mechanic can convey accurately the faults found on a vehicle and the remedial work required to repair the problem.  At the end of year two at college I passed the English exam to equivalent “O” level standard.  I also passed my motor vehicle exams in the top 3 of the entire college group of motor mechanic apprentices.

At year 3 of my apprenticeship my wages rose to £56 per week or $100.  My friends who left school at the same time as me and took different careers to me, were typically earning double or treble my wages!  I had been allocated to several qualified mechanics in this time period.  An apprentice is swapped around the workshop to different mechanics as to not learn bad habits of any one particular mechanic.

A special day occurred mid-way in my third year of my apprenticeship, I was allowed to work on my own without supervision.  My garage had sufficient trust in me and my new found skills to work un-supervised.  At the end of year 3 I took my final City and Guilds of London exams which I passed with distinctions and commendations.

Technically I was qualified but my apprenticeship was a 4 to 5 year duration.  Working with Volvo my garage sent me on vocational training courses through out year 4 of my apprenticeship.  My wages were now £76 or $140 per week.  I stayed in hotels at the UK Volvo training centres.  I was taught the specifics of repairing Volvo cars in minute detail.  I was issued a Volvo passport which records my vocational courses and qualifications which enabled me to have proof to any prospective employers of my level of specialisation in Volvo cars.

My last exam was the generic National craftsman’s certificate in motor mechanics.  I was tested along side many mechanics from around the country on a day long series of mechanical and academic tests.  I passed the test with a 91% average, my apprenticeship was completed in four and a half  years.  My weekly wage rose to £275 or $500 a week I had made it!

Over the next 20 years I continued vocational training courses to keep me abreast of the ever changing technology of motor vehicles.  I went into management in my mid twenties and I eventually became a garage manager at the age of 27. Ill health ended my physical ability to work on cars in 2002.

In conclusion I hope this brief over view of my mechanical training will discourage you from thinking of Motor Mechanics as Grease Monkey’s.  As with any other trade there are good mechanics and poor mechanics.  Feel free to ask the qualifications of the Mechanic who works on your car you maybe pleasantly surprised!

Lord Banks